Mother’s Day Blues

            When Mother’s Day comes around it can stir up a slew of emotions. Contrary to what the marketing teams propagate it is not always a “happy” day for people. And unfortunately, they really don’t make cards for those people because that part gets overlooked. That’s why we feel it is immensely important to let you know, we see you. Your emotional experience IS important. So, if you are looking for ways to honor those emotions and thoughts, read on.

If you are feeling left out and have a desire to celebrate it’s okay to think outside of the box. The term “mother” can look differently for each person. So think about your definition and reach out to those that fit that bill for your life. Celebrate other mother figures in your life: Think of other people who have been like a mother to you or have nurtured you in some way. Reach out to them and express your gratitude for their love and support.

If Mother's Day is difficult for you, for whatever your reason, it is okay take the day to focus on self-care. Do something that makes you happy, whether that's going for a walk, reading a book or watching a movie. It is acceptable to give yourself permission to pass on how others deem this day ought to look like.

If you are really struggling with this day, please know that you are not alone! Putting out some feelers, you may be surprised by who else may be struggling and looking to connect with someone who may relate. Reach out to friends, family members, or support groups who may be feeling the same way as you are. It can be good to talk to others who are experiencing similar feelings to your own and remind each other of the inclusion, instead of feeling mandated to sit alone in the exclusion.

If you are looking to participate in a different way consider volunteering at a local shelter or nonprofit organization that helps mothers or children. Giving back can be a rewarding and meaningful way to spend the day.

Whatever emotions that are coming up for your today, they are valid. It’s important to recognize your emotions and allow yourself to feel them. Whether you feel happy or sad, angry or disappointed the first step is allowing yourself permission to acknowledge and accept your feelings. There's no right or wrong way to feel on Mother's Day. And there is no right or wrong way to go through this day. You get to choose.

By

Reesa Morala, MA, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist