Kiss & Tell: What Your Kids Deserve to Know
Why Kids Need to See PDA Between Their Parents
Let’s talk about PDA—yes, that public display of affection that makes some people cringe and others swoon. When you’re a parent, PDA might feel like a distant memory, buried under mountains of laundry, carpools, and meal preps. But here’s the thing: your kids need to see it. And no, I’m not saying you need to recreate a rom-com kiss in the school pickup line (though more power to you if you’re up for it). I’m talking about the simple, everyday moments of affection that teach your children invaluable lessons about love, relationships, and self-worth.
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I’ve seen the transformative power of modeling healthy affection. At Embrace Renewal Therapy & Wellness Collective, I work with couples who want to strengthen their relationship not just for themselves but for their entire family. Let’s dive into why showing a little PDA can make a big difference.
1. It Models How to Express Love in a Multitude of Ways
Hugs, kisses, holding hands, a quick “I love you”—these are the building blocks of affection. When kids see you expressing love in different ways, it expands their understanding of what love looks like. It’s not just about grand gestures; it’s about the everyday moments that say, “I care about you.”
By modeling affection, you’re teaching your children that love isn’t a one-size-fits-all concept. It’s diverse, adaptable, and uniquely expressed. This foundation helps them develop healthier relationships in the future.
2. It Normalizes Expressing Love
In some households, love can feel like a four-letter word—unspoken, awkward, or reserved for special occasions. But when you normalize expressions of love, you’re giving your children permission to do the same.
Imagine your child growing up in an environment where love isn’t hidden but celebrated. They’re more likely to feel comfortable expressing their own emotions, which leads to stronger relationships and better communication as they grow.
3. It Shows Appropriate, Kind, and Respectful Ways to Give and Receive Love
Let’s face it: kids are sponges. They’re constantly observing and learning from you. When you model kind and respectful ways to show affection, you’re setting the bar for what healthy interactions look like.
Holding hands, giving a quick peck on the cheek, or offering a heartfelt compliment teaches your kids that love is about mutual respect and kindness. They learn not just how to give love but also how to receive it with grace.
4. It Gives Them a Baseline for Their Own Worth in Relationships
When children see their parents treating each other with love and respect, it sets a baseline for what they should expect in their own relationships. They internalize the message: “I deserve to be treated with care and kindness.”
On the flip side, when affection is absent or replaced with conflict, kids may struggle to recognize their own worth in relationships. By modeling a loving partnership, you’re giving them the gift of self-esteem and healthy expectations.
5. It Destigmatizes Asking for and Getting Your Needs Met
Let’s not forget that love isn’t just about giving; it’s also about receiving. When you express affection openly, you’re showing your kids that it’s okay to ask for what they need in a relationship. Whether it’s a hug, a kind word, or quality time, they learn that their needs matter.
This lesson is crucial for building healthy, balanced relationships. It teaches them to advocate for themselves and to seek partners who value their needs.
How Couples Counseling Can Help
If expressing affection feels challenging or unnatural, you’re not alone. Many couples struggle with showing love openly, especially when life gets hectic. That’s where Couples Counseling at Embrace Renewal Therapy comes in.
Whether you’re looking to rekindle your connection, improve communication, or model healthier behaviors for your kids, counseling provides a safe space to grow together. I offer sessions in person in Murrieta, CA, or virtually for couples anywhere in California. Together, we’ll explore what’s holding you back and work toward a relationship that feels fulfilling and authentic.
Let’s Set the Example
Your relationship is the blueprint your kids will use to build their own. By showing affection, you’re not just nurturing your partnership—you’re shaping the next generation’s understanding of love.
So go ahead, hold hands in the grocery store, steal a kiss in the kitchen, or cuddle on the couch during movie night. Your kids are watching, and what they see could change their lives.
Ready to create a stronger, more connected relationship? Schedule a Couples Counseling session with me today and take the first step toward a healthier, happier family dynamic.
